Dickens was describing my day.
I love that 4 people loved me enough to confront me with my "erratic" "off the rails" behavior of late.
I love that one of them teared up and expressed his love for me in a depth that softened my evil, hard heart.
I love that we probed together possible causes and solutions.
I love that they all agreed to keep praying and seeking discernment.
So far only my wife has heard from God and what she heard was something like. Just keep supporting and loving the big lug, eventually I will handle everything, eventually, in MY TIME>
I appreciated it but it hurt to think that they could have pictured "drugs" being involved or alcohol. My dad was an active alcoholic and he did his best with his life after seeing "who knows what" in the Korean War, but overall he would get a D- grade for being a dad. Literally showing up only occasionally to drop off his very irregular alimony payment, handing me and my sister a $5 bill and leaving without saying a word...."thanks?!"
Drugs have been used by the powers that be to harm many that I love, God's mercy keeps me from that also.
So that part of it was "the worst of times".
At work tonight, I had a lovely, honest convo with a young woman who is "doing her best" as a single mom with a true, blue, through and through as_hole as a boyfriend, and a world class dick head as an ex-husband (IMVAO). We strengthened and deepened our friendship. It was "good for the soul". People of the opposite sex cannot maintain a pure friendship. That is bullsh_t! By the grace of God and through the mercy of God we are going over 10 years as deep, close, personal friends. It drives many people crazy and rumors fly all over the place. Yeshua was alone at the well having a very personal conversation with a woman and a samaritan woman at that, hummmmmmmmmmm.
have a good Sunday and remember, Sunday worship is a gentile invention. The God of Israel chooses to be worshiped on Saturday, by a people who cease from the works of their hands. PERIOD.
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